Esther//Queen of Persia

Journal entry for April 19, 69 BC

 

Dear Diary,

How close I've come to death today. My heart pales at the thought of how much hate Haman has for my people. I am so thankful for my uncle, Mordecai, who found out what Haman was planning to do to the entire nation of Israel and came and told me. If it was not for Mordecai's wisdom and obedience to God, we would have faced certain death. And yet, God appointed me as the one to tell the King. No one else has as much access and influence on Xerxes as I do. But I have to admit, when Mordecai told me about Haman's plot to kill the Jewish nation and asked me to intervene, I was nervous. Going before Xerxes might mean immediate death for me if he was in a bad mood. I didn't want to take my chances, but I knew that if I didn't speak up, death was certain, not only for me, but also for my family, and every other Jewish person. So three days ago I began fasting and praying, pouring out my heart to God and begging him to intervene. It occurred to me that if God rescued my people when they were being terrorized by their cruel Egyptian masters, then we can trust him to rescue us again. He is a faithful God and he loves us all so very much! 

Spending three full days on my knees in prayer has humbled me. I may be the Queen of Persia, but if I do not do what God has called me to do, then everything that I do is worthless. I think that when God chooses leaders, he doesn't look for the most qualified. I am far from being the most qualified for this job, and yet, God was willing to appoint me to this position. God searches for obedient hearts surrendered to his will and uses them to bring him glory. No, I'm no where close to be as obedient to the Lord as I wish I was, but I am striving to be the best queen I can be because he gave me this position to accomplish his purposes. 

That's why  when I woke up today, I was determined to somehow break the word to the King that my people will die if nothing is done. I believe that Xerxes doesn't want the entire nation of Israel destroyed, but what if he does? How will I go on living if I am spared on that dreadful day? Will he kill me along with everyone else, too? So many questions go unanswered. Be still, my soul. The Lord is with me, so I have nothing to fear. This very morning I approached King Xerxes and waited mesmerized as he slowly held out his royal sceptor towards me, inviting me into his presence. Softly and ever so qiuetly, peace crept into my whole being and gave me a sense of belonging there in the King's court. As I glided toward the throne, dressed in my best dress, Xerxes greeted me with a warm, "Hello, my beloved, Esther. How are you this morning, dear?" His words soothed my soul and gave me the courage to speak up. I eventually cordially asked him to come to a banquet that I prepared on my own for him, Haman, and myself. 

Thinking that would solve the problem, I prepared a very nice meal and decorated my dining room with ornate decorations, hoping to please the King. When he arrived with Haman, I wanted to just blurt out my request, but I held my tongue. Xerxes and Haman greatly enjoyed the dinner, and afterwards, Xerxes asked me if there was anything I wanted. He said that he would buy me any jewlry or clothes or basically anything else I might possibly want. Right then might have been a good time to ask for deliverance for the Jewish nation, my people, but I felt God's restraint on me, so I waited, and instead, invited them to come back tomorrow night. Then I will break the news to the King and have him punish Haman for Haman's disobedience. 

Courage...it's hard to come by. But it's vital if you're ever going to win any wars in this life. I approached Xerxes yesterday, but only because God directed me to do so and gave me the faith to trust that he would provide. I am about to go and spend more time in prayer, because I know that I will never find the courage I need without God working in me and through me. He's given me this position of authority over the nation of Persia and my people, the Israelites, and I intend to be wise in the way I act and make the most of every opportunity that I'm given.

Until tomorrow,

Esther

Deborah//Judge

God called me to be a judge for the Israelites, to decide disputes between them. My court was located in the hill country of Ephraim between Ramah and Bethel. 

Journal entry for January 23, 32 BC

Dear Diary,

Whew, what a day it's been! Barak and his army of 10,000 men have just defeated Sisera and his men at Mt Tabor. Praise God for the great victory! But the thing is, if I hadn't stood up for what was right and told Barak that I would go to battle with him, we would not have gained this victory today. When I summoned him to my court and told him that we were going to go fight Sisera's army, his eyes filled with fear and I could see him shrink back in fear. He didn't want to go because he was afraid, and he told me so. I confess that it is very easy to let feelings of fear creep into your heart if you let them, but I always remind myself that God is greater. He is far more powerful than any man, and he is on our side, something which Barak must have forgotten. Barak said that he would only go to fight Sisera's army if I went too. 

You're probably thinking, "How would having a lady, even the most powerful one around, come with you to fight in a war and help you win a difficult battle against a large army?" Seems kind of silly to me. I was thinking the same thing and I'm pretty amazed by how much Barak relies on me. Shouldn't he be the fearless one? While he may be my army commander and I may be just a woman, I realized, in a split second, how much courage and strength God has given me. God certainly knew I could use the extra courage, especially when Barak is so weak. I wondered if he could really defeat Sisera; his fear was so great. Then I went to God and asked him for guidance, and he led me to tell Barak that I would go, too, but because of Barak's fear and reliance on me, a woman, God declared that the glory would go to me instead. 

As we set off early this morning on foot down the steep slopes of Mount Tabor to meet Sisera and his 900 men, I noticed that Barak had a sheepish look on his face. He was ashamed that he wasn't going to get any glory for the victory God had promised us. Barak didn't barely say a word as we approached the enemy army. When we got close enough to fight, Barak rode full speed ahead and fought courageously. I couldn't help but wonder what he might have done if I wasn't there watching him. I watched as Sisera and his soldiers were thrown into a panic by the LORD and then as Barak chased them all the way to Harosheth-haggoyim, leaving none alive. Only Sisera managed to escape, and he ran to Jael's tent. I've heard rumors that she killed Sisera, but I'm still waiting for a full report which will hopefully arrive in a few days. Until then, we won't know exactly what happened to Sisera, but everyone is pretty sure that he is dead. 

Let me tell you, if you listen to God and do what he tells you to do, you'll be successful in everything you do! God loves to bless his children like he blessed us today. He wanted to bless Barak, my military leader, but Barak was afraid and so he refused to obey without my help. God made it clear that he will work through anyone - both men and women - to accomplish his purpose. He allows women to lead his church, including me, and it is not because he wants men and women to have the same roles. God uses godly women who are committed to serving him fearlessly. He searches for people who live lives of integrity and elevates to the positions he has called them to. I've realized that women can be leaders in the church and the community of faith if God allows it. He gives different people various gifts and abilities and has appointed people for the leadership positions that he has set up. God is using me to judge and guide the nation of Israel, and I'm just a woman. But I obeyed, and God worked through me today. I can't wait to see what he does in the future!

Women as Leaders in Christian Communities?

Can women be leaders in Christian communities? This question has been a weighty topic in Christian communities for centuries. Paul gives specific instructions to Corinthian women (1 Corinthians 14:34) to remain silent in church, so should all women remain quiet? Certainly not. The instructions Paul gave were for one church, and the majority of women in that church would not have received a quality education like the education that many women around the world receive today.

In light of the education that women receive, it only seems to make sense that they should be allowed to have roles of authority in the church, as long as they are teaching the truth of the gospel and are committed to shepherding the flock.

Following, we'll take a look at some biblical examples of women leaders, including Deborah and Esther, through "journal entries" they could have written during significant moments and times in their lives. These are two examples of women whom God gave positions of leadership over their communities, and they fearlessly obeyed him. Deborah was a judge over Israel and Esther was the Queen of Persia, and they both accomplished much for the kingdom of God.

Therefore, as clearly seen from the examples of Esther and Deborah as well as others, (Phoebe, Priscilla, Junia), we can conclude that God appoints women as leaders in the church to accomplish his purpose. He has not created women to sit quietly by the side and not speak at all. No, God has qualified women to lead the church. What he really desires are willing women who will stand up for the word of God and make it known to his people.